Cruisin' for a Bruisin'

I am trying to dig out my house. I am in a twilight zone now, not quite at the "everything must go!" stage but in such a pickle with the mess I've created while trying to dig that I see no other way out. And no place to sleep tonight, for that matter.

And I keep finding things that throw me back a few years. Sometimes I think "why in hell did I ever keep that?" and other times I'm so absorbed in my trip down memory lane that I forget my original mission.

For example: I came across a notebook small enough to stash in a purse. In the back of it were some notations not worth keeping. I almost tossed it. BUT -- in the front was my little diary of the cruise I went on in 1999.

First of all, people, I want you to know I am not a cruise person.

Shortly before I went on this cruise I told someone who was trying to get me to fork over big bucks to go on a "class reunion" cruise that the only way I'd ever go on a cruise is if someone paid my way.

Be careful of what you don't wish for. A few days later I got a call from a friend who'd already booked a cruise for 2 and her significant other was unable to sail away with her.

Being the good friend that I am, I took her boyfriend's place, went on the cruise and recorded events in my tiny notebook.

One entry that really made me laugh was about sharing a room and one tiny hairdryer.

One afternoon we came back to the room after a long, hot day on shore and had to get ready for the early seating formal dinner.

My friend took the bathroom first, telling me "We have 40 minutes!"

Being a low maintenance girl, I wasn't worried. I laid down on my bed and rested. The next thing I knew, my immaculately groomed and coiffed friend emerged from the bathroom announcing, "We have 7 minutes!"

My entry states that she looked great at dinner and was awfully composed considering she knew I wanted to fucking kill her.