Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Santa's Last Legs

Every year my mother in law gives me (us) a Santa. This year through stupid luck I ended up not with the Santa that was handed me, but with a Santa I really liked. This morning I woke up and found his feet. After looking around, I found the rest of him.


Double Amputee


Although it may look simple to glue him back together, it is not. I have devised a repair plan and by the time I am done implementing it, I will have invested enough time and materials to make it one very expensive Santa.

And how did Santa end up dismembered? I wasn't a witness but my number one suspect is the plant killing Skittles.

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

My Yoville House

Welcome to my cozy Yoville house! When you first walk in the door you are right smack dab in my living room. It is decorated for the holidays. I don't have a real tree because I'm cheap and haven't worked in a long time.


Living Room


When I visited Yoville to take these pictures, my parrot, Polly, had X's for eyes. Evidently I needed to feed her. She's fine now.

The door behind me on the right leads to my kitchen.


Kitchen


Another door leads into my bedroom. Be quiet! I am taking a nap!


Bedroom


My bathroom is off my bedroom. I love how they pixelated my lower half when I sat on the pot. This is the first time I sat on my Yoville pot. It's a wonder I'm still alive!


Don't Look!


Look at my bedroom again. See that book case? It is really a secret door that leads to my library. The room is a reward I won for doing Yovillian things.


My Secret Library


Back through the secret bookcase door, through the bedroom, back to the living room and into the hallway.


Hall


The room off the hallway was another reward for doing Yovillian things. It is supposed to be a bathroom but since I had so much furniture and way too many fireplaces, I turned it into a sitting room.


Sitting Room



Ahh.... I love my Yoville house. Actually, it's an apartment. Houses cost REAL MONEY. Forget that noise. One of my FB & Yoville friends has a modern beach house with every one of the many rooms stuffed to the gills with expensive furniture. I'm thinking she is giving virtual blow jobs to live like that.

Not me! I don't even go to work anymore since they turned the furniture factory into a bakery. I have to pay to buy ingredients and mix them up and stick them in the oven. If I don't visit Yoville in a timely manner, my baked goods burn and I am screwed. Plus I have to PAY to CLEAN THE FRIGGIN OVENS whether I burn something or not.

I get enough of that in real life, thank you very much. They had better start making virtual life fun. I guess I can always visit my apartment and hide out in my secret library.

Monday, December 21, 2009

Catching Up

I have been lax in posting. Here is a short version of the last few months.

October



It sucked. It was cold and wet. On Columbus Day we had this:


Happy Columbus Day


October continued its cold wetness and brought us to --

November



November was warm, dry and sunny. Farmers finished what they couldn't do in October. Plants were confused.


Bloom in November


We survived stuffing ourselves on Thanksgiving and the next night was the party H had planned and for which I was struggling to finish altering the vintage dress.


Vintage Dress


That photo does not do the dress justice. It looked fabulous hung on the frame of lovely H. I did not get any pictures of H in her great aunt's dress. We got to the party, she was busy, the food got laid out, we ate and then ...




~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ - ~ -





ER


Let's just say Crab and I missed the rest of the party, the cake, and the photo ops. Crab is still alive, none the worse for the wear.

November also brought many frustrations (see previous posts). Through the help of my personal hero, I finally came through those. It was a long, tough haul for someone not as bright as the most awesome guru of geekness. The trojan is vanquished! The queen reigns! I so ♥ you Mush!


My Hero


My hero will get a present in the mail as soon as I get around to it, which may not be real soon because now we are in

December



December has brought us snow, blizzards, fog, arctic temps and crap since it began. My mother called today to tell me Christmas at her house is CANCELED. H told me that, barring a Christmas miracle, she is not going to make the journey down. I am sad that my H won't be here, yet grateful she will not be on the interstate with the idiots.

Next year: Nothing but greatness! After the spring thaw, that is.

Saturday, December 05, 2009

Every Thing I Touch

Every thing turns to S&%# pretty fast. Just a warning. Do not come near me and get the S&%# cooties!!

I'm trying, I really am. But it's a baby step forward and two giant steps back.

On the other hand, I am reading (mostly when I wake up in the middle of the night and cannot get back to sleep) Barbara Kingsolver's latest novel and am loving it to death. I want to swim in her brain until I drown. I want to own this book so I can highlight it, underline passages and write in the margins.

But mostly I want to sleep straight through for at least 7 hours. And own this novel. And The Poisonwood Bible. Best. Book. Ever. But then, I'm not finished with The Lacuna.